As an entrepreneur, I have always had a hard time completely disconnecting from my work. On vacation, I often find myself working before the rest of the family wakes up. That works for me, but it also runs against the advice of social scientists, who recommend complete psychological detachment, meaning mentally switching off from work and not just physically stepping away, to promote rest and recovery.
For years I assumed that meant I was doing vacation wrong. Then, as part of my doctoral research at DePaul University, I surveyed 68 entrepreneurs, and the results surprised me. For entrepreneurs’ psychological detachment was not related to any of the well-being measures I tested. Entrepreneurs who fully unplugged were no better off than those who stayed somewhat connected.
So, is there a different way to think about this relationship? Does staying connected have to be a bad thing?
As I reflected on those questions, I thought about the relationship between a parent and a child. There is something soothing about checking in with your children. You don’t need to know what’s happening twenty-four hours a day, but a quick daily check-in to confirm everything is alright eases a parent’s worry.
Perhaps that is the relationship most entrepreneurs have with their business. Many entrepreneurs have sacrificed and invested in their companies in a way that parallels the investment a parent makes in a child. Asking them to cut off all contact may not bring rest. It may just replace work with worry.
How to Check In Without Getting Pulled In
The key is making sure the check-in soothes you rather than consumes you. A few guidelines that have worked for me:
- Pick a set time. For me, it’s early morning before the family is up. A predictable window keeps work from bleeding into the whole day.
- Set a time limit. Thirty minutes to an hour is enough to confirm nothing is on fire and handle anything truly urgent.
- Decide in advance what counts as urgent. If your team knows what should reach you and what can wait, your check-in stays short.
- Then be fully present. Once the check-in is done, close the laptop and put the phone away. The point is to buy peace of mind for the rest of the day.
Don’t Feel Guilty
If you’re an entrepreneur who finds it soothing to check email or make a few phone calls while you’re away, don’t feel guilty. A quick check-in may be exactly what lets you enjoy the rest of your day, instead of letting fear of the unknown rob you of your time away from the daily grind.
What about you? Are you a daily check-in entrepreneur, or do you fully disconnect? I’d love to hear what works for you in the comments.